How low can I go.... you don't even want to know

So I just got back from walking 217 steps to the liquor store....Why does my life have to be so hard? I mean, I get that you should have to work for your alcoholism, but 217 STEPS!!!! And now that my only friend I have my bottle of wine (we will call him Fred) I thought I was ready to curl up on the couch and watch really awesome tv. So naturally I searched Netflix for Little House on the Prairie. (which I need to point out is the stupidest word ever. Prairie should be embarrassed!) Just to make my life even harder than it already was, Little House on the Crappy Word is not on "watch instant." I might have reached a new low for even doing a search for Little House, and then a further low by being totally bummed I can not watch it right now, but I will never go as low as wait for Little House in the mail. I guess I will never know if

***possible Spoiler Alert***

Ma and Pa Ingles put Nelly in charge of the Sex Den in Season 9.