If this isn't the American Dream, than I am not American

I don't know about you, but I am constantly 2 thoughts away from being Steve Slater. I fantasize about exploding and causing a huge scene about every 15 minutes. I constantly have a running stream of cuss words ready to go at a moments notice. I even have a nickname picked out for everyone I work with, should a situation arise that they piss me off. I sit in every meeting visualizing myself standing on top of the table and addressing each person on why I find them to be so stupid. These are things I just THINK about.

My new Hero ACTUALLY went on a PA system, cussed every out (they no doubt deserved it), deployed an emergency slide (who the hell doesn't love a slide), stole some beer (becuase the first thing you want when quitting your job is a cold one) and cruised down to the tarmac at 9.8 meters per second squared and hurried home to his girl where he engaged in celebratory "I just lost my shit and ruined my future" shag. (Of course, that was cut short when the cops showed up).

Mr. Slater picked an interesting time for his display. I had a pretty decent interview yesterday and the reality of potentially walking in and saying "I am fed up with this crap and I am outta here" has become more than a passing a thought.

If I do choose to change jobs, I will be in a position to pull a Slater. I admit, it will not be easy!! We have no glass ceiling at work I can jump through. I work in a basement so rappelling out of my window is not an option. I am not a guy so it is not as easy to spell "I QUIT" in piss on my boss's desk. On top of this, my normal level of "crazy" at work is something the staff has become quite accustom too. I could sit on the floor in the corner and eat Campbell's Cheddar Cheese Soup out of the can and only reply to questions in the voice of Beaker from the muppets and they would not even think twice. I will need to reach to new levels.

I would like officially to go on the record saying..... Thank you Mr. Slater, for throwing the gauntlet down. I ACCEPT your challenge!!